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"A problem shared is a problem halved, so is your problem really yours or
just half of someone else's?"
David Brent, The Office

"If you can't rule the waves, waive the rules"
- Wall Street quip

"For every vision, there is an equal and opposite revision."
- Anonymous

"Advertising is the art of making whole lies out of half truths."
- Edgar Shoaff

"Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a
winner and a loser at the same time."
- Demetri Martin

"I only go to work on days that don't end in a 'y'."
- Robert Paul

"I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early."
- Charles Lamb

"Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?"
- Edgar Bergen

"I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours."
- Jerome K Jerome ('Three Men in a Boat')

"By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may get to be a boss and work
twelve hours a day."
- Robert Frost

"A good rule of thumb is if you've made it to thirty-five and your job still
requires you to wear a name tag, you've made a serious vocational error."
- Dennis Miller

"The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to let them."
- Robert Frost

"The golden rule of work - the boss's jokes are ALWAYS funny."
- Robert Paul

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."

- Napoleon

"Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please."

- Mark Twain

"All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy."

- Spike Milligan

"The trouble with the global village is all the village idiots!"
- Anonymous

"Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm"

- Churchill